


We Just Don't Have Any Clue

by Lady_Blackhawk



Series: Fun in Alternate Universe [1]
Category: Young Avengers (Comics)
Genre: Gen, Lorna and Pietro also make appearances, psych au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-05
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-01-09 10:23:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12274464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Blackhawk/pseuds/Lady_Blackhawk
Summary: The Young Avengers Psych AU! Tommy Lehnsherr ends up in a bind and pretends to be a psychic. His brother Billy gets sucked into this game. Psychics, their own detective agency and a clueless police department. Suddenly there's new problems and new adventures in crime solving.





	1. Pilot

            The television blasted in the background as Tommy Lehnsherr’s tongue was busy entertaining the cute girl he had picked up at the bar. Macy, Tracy, Grandy, Candy. Candy!That was her name. She was sitting on his lap, her back to the television, as he tried to tear himself away to hear what was going on.

            On the screen was a store manager, twiddling his thumbs and trying to explain about the break-in that happened at his pet store. Damn it! Tommy swore, years living with Police Commissionaire, now former Police Commissionaire Erik Lehnsherr and their Aunt Lorna, who was now the Chief of Police in San Francisco, with his brother had taught him a thing or two about figuring out what’s going on with very little information.

            Not wanting to let his hands go from underneath Candy’s shirt, he sighed, keeping one hand firmly on her bra strap, he used the other to grab the phone.

            “Who’re you calling?” asked Candy letting him catch a few little moments of oxygen, before moving towards his neck.

            “Gotta make a quick phone call to the police.” He told her and dialed, listening for the dispatcher at the end of the line “Channel 4, the store owner, he did it, twiddling thumbs, twitchy eyes, take him, grill him, he did it…oh and on an unrelated note, the registration on the news van have expired...great, I will…thank you.”

            Candy stopped kissing his neck to stare at him, “Are you a cop?” She asked.

            “Nope. Promise. Does that disappoint you?” asked Tommy with a pout.

            Candy sighed, “I was hoping you’d have a pair of handcuffs.”

            “Don’t need to be a cop to have handcuffs,” he said with a grin.

            The following day, in a beautiful and happy mood, Tommy hopped the steps to the Santa Barbara police department and sauntered over to the front desk, where a pretty woman was on the phone. “Yes, I am telling you, $300 and she told me all sorts of details.” She had a crystal around her neck and funny earrings.

            “Pardon me!” The woman sharply pointed to a bench where a recently arrested suspect sat, “No actually, I’m here for a reward…”  She once again, with even more force pointed towards the bench.  She was talking to someone about her dead grandmother and some shaman lady who supposedly spoke to her. Tommy sighed and went to sit down in the center hallway, next to a large, beefy suspect with a teardrop tattoo, with what appeared to be pieces of a busted tail light on his arm. “So what are you in for? Busted your Ex’s car?”  

            The guy looked up, “Her new boyfriend’s…or so they say. They’ve got no witnesses.”

            “Sweet,” said Tommy grinning, “Though you might want to do something about the uh…” he pointed to the shards, the guy nodded and dusted the shards as best he could., but instead of landing on the floor they landed inside his shoe. Tommy’ attempt to help him ended there.

He looked around and saw the IT guy walking past, with a green bowtie, “Hey Teddy,” he called to the guy in the shirt and funky tie with stripes on it, and blonde hair. He was sitting at his desk, with a Captain America comic in hand. “Did Jones approve your time off?”  Soon a uniform came and grabbed the other guy to put him in detention room 2.

“Hey Jonas! Yes! I’m excited. San Diego this weekend and then next month is Santa Barbara’s annual con. Got my costume all ready.”

“Exciting. Any word on your new partner since Arnie retired?”

“Got a girl transferring in from Miami, this’ll be her first time out of uniform. So I’ll be her Arnie...” Teddy got out of his chair, in order to let Jonas, get in, “So Doc, will she ever play the violin again?”

“She’ll be fine, I’m just upgrading some software and installing additional hardware that’ll make putting out a BOLO so much easier. When’s the new girl coming in?”

“Monday. Soon as I get back.” Jonas nodded.

The one named Jonas got to working on the computer and Teddy left towards the evidence room.

The lady that was on the phone came over and escorted him down to what appeared to be an interrogation room, where two detectives were waiting. There was something in the body language. The male detective looked annoyed as he moved past the woman, and she looked like she wanted to be anywhere, but where she was.

“Is this where I pick up my reward?” asked Tommy as the cops greeted him.

“We just want to clarify a few things first,” said the woman.

“Okay…” said Tommy sitting down, “But you did arrest the store manager, right?”

“We’ll be asking the questions if you don’t mind.” Said the other one, “I am Detective Bradley, this is Detective Bishop, for the record.” Bishop sat down across from Tommy, while Bradley leaned on the two-way mirror.

“Nice to meet you,” said Tommy winking at Bishop, “Ask away.”

“Where were you last night?”

“Robbing a pet store,” seeing the delighted look on the male detective’s face he started laughing, “I’m kidding. Swear.  I was doing what everyone usually does, what I am sure you were doing. Not solving crime.”

“You’re not exactly helping your case.”

“My case?” asked Tommy, “No, no no, wait a minute…you can’t seriously…I’m a suspect?”

“Our lead suspect!”

“I gave you the guy.”

“He had a partner.” Said Bradley.

“I have to find that guy too? Seriously. When do you do your job?”

“See…your information was good, so good that it could have only come from the inside.” Wow. I guess the police department had gone downhill since Gramps retired, Lorna moved, and Pietro quit, thought Tommy.

“I’ve called in tips before, check it out.”

“Oh, we did, we really did,” said Bradley, crossing to sit down beside Bishop and pulling out a file, “And here’s what we learned. You are currently unemployed and have never held a job for longer than six months.” Tommy rolled his eyes “And you have a criminal record.”

“I was eighteen.”

“Oh, eighteen, that makes it okay.” Mocked Bradley, “Let me just take my pen and scratch it out.”

Tommy sighed, “I borrowed a car.”

“Stole a car.”

“To impress a girl…” Tommy was so sick of telling this story over and over again.

“Look Mr. Lehnsherr all of this is a bit hard to believe.”

“Would it help if I told you that she had a bit of a reputation and I was o for…high school. Look there were extenuating circumstances….aaand…as you can see in the file, the arresting office was my Aunt Lorna she was trying to teach me a lesson.”

“Did you learn it?”

“As a matter of fact, I did.” Said Tommy, “Look my grandfather was the police commissionaire.”

“Oh…well…of course, grandchildren of police commissionaires are totally above the law,” snorted Bradley.

“Well, I’m not eighteen anymore and I have never been arrested since. So…” tried Tommy getting annoyed.

“It’s just a little hard to believe that you solved all these crimes by…” he checked the file, “Watching channel six.”

“Okay that’s a lie,” said Tommy, “I don’t always watch channel six, sometimes channel 4, occasionally channel 8, but only because of the weathergirl. Adorable.”

“And you can just read guilt off the television set?”

“You can’t?” mocked Tommy.

“Don’t you trivialize police work.”

“I don’t need to,” said Tommy, “I’ll leave some of it for you.” He stood up, “You can’t keep me here, I know my rights.” He headed towards the door.

“Good then you know you have the right to remain silent…” Bradley began reciting the Maranda as the lady in uniform earlier appeared as did Detective Teddy.

“You’re serious?”

“Maybe a few hours in a holding cell will jog your memory.” Seeing the lovely gentlemen inside the holding cell, the idea did not particularly appeal to Tommy.

“Mr. Lehnsherr just give us an explanation as to how you acquired this information,” said the pretty lady detective.

“No, it is too late. Detective Altman,” said Bradley, “Would you be so kind as to book him.” Teddy sighed. He had been a detective for a year already and Bradley sometimes still saw him a uniform.

“Seriously? For the walk to the lobby?”

“It’s that or a reasonable explanation, Lehnsherr, that’s all we need.” Tommy sighed great, what was he supposed to do now. The lady in the uniform, however, gave him an idea.

“Alright, you win, you got me,” said Tommy, “I got the information because I am a psychic.” Before Bradley could say anything, he twitched and turned to the lady, “Your grandmother would be so proud of you.”

Bewildered she stared at him. “You spoke to her?”

“I did,” said Tommy, “She’s safe, comfortable. But she wants you to stop spending money on those con artists.”

“The palm readers?” Tommy nodded.

“Just so we’re clear, you’re claiming to be a psychic?” asked Bishop.

“That’s right!” He waved his hands around to Bradley and Bishop, “How else would I know that the two of you used to sleep together, but recently one of you…my money…is on Bishop called it off.” Teddy snorted behind them. Tommy was on a roll now, “Batman, Superman…I’m getting superheroes, Live long and prosper…” he turned to Teddy, “You are going to San Diego Comic Con, this weekend congrats….and in costume. Bold.”

Teddy stared at him, “You go to multiple conventions a year within the state of California.”

“That’s amazing.”

“Oh come on, who’s buying this?” asked Bradley. Teddy and the front desk lady raise their hands and so does one of the guys from the tank to the left.

“Wait! I got it. Go to detention room 2. Shakedown your vandal…you’ll find all the evidence you need in….” he made his leg twitch, “in his left shoe.”

Bradley walked away and headed to check on the vandal. Tommy had been released by Bishop and he was back at the welcome booth.

“I am getting,” he told the lady, “The letter L.”

“Her dog, Lulu,” she told him, “Did she say anything else?” Tommy looked around and saw Bradley.

“I’m sorry the connection is gone, there’s suddenly a very negative presence here.” He didn’t hear what Bishop and Bradley were saying, but Bradley did not look happy, that was for sure.

On his way out of the precinct, a very pregnant woman stopped him, “Tommy Lehnsherr, I’m Jessica Jones interim Police chief.”

“Yeah,” said Tommy, “I know.” He looked just like his grandfather and uncle, noted Jessica as she went over the details of the case and offered him a chance to audition. “Listen, look, I do have a confession to make.” He adds this after she informs him of the consequences of lying. “It’s not just me. My brother. He’s a psychic too. I’ll need to bring him in on this. We were kind of born this way.” Jessica stares at him like she isn’t sure if she should kill him or hire him. But she agrees.

Meanwhile across town, at UC Santa Barbara, in a small office occupied by a lowly PhD student, in the history department, sat Billy Lehnsherr. He was taking only one course over the summer, while he worked on his dissertation on the influence of antisemitism in the election of FDR. He was concentrating deep on his work, typing away on his laptop, and he nearly jumped when there was a knock.

“Have no fear, your older brother is here,” Tommy came in with a grin on his face.

“Thirty seconds!” said Billy standing up to hug his twin, “And you never let me forget it. What’s up?”

“I found us the last job we will ever need.”

“Tommy, you’ve had 50 something odd jobs since we graduated high school.”

“Yes and they were awesome. But this one takes the cake.” Billy did not look convinced. “I figured out how we can finally make our dream come true, to do the thing we’ve wanted to do since we were kids.”

“To invent something?”

“No.”

“To take over the world?”

“Close…but no. To be detectives.”

“Please tell me you didn’t sign us up for the police academy.” Tommy laughed.

“No, I didn’t…But this is a golden opportunity to use all those skills Grandpa taught us.”

“How?” asked Billy. And boy, he loved his brother. Tommy was his best friend. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for Tommy, but sometimes boundaries had to be set.

“We’re going to open up our own, private detective agency.” As Tommy filled him in on what was going on and the case Jessica Jones had assigned them, involving a kidnapped the son of a major rich guy. Billy’s face twisted from mild intrigue to full blow scowl.

“So…we’re going to pretend to be psychics? Who is going to buy that?”

“Just trust me, you and me, we’ll go in, solve the case, and then you can spend the entire weekend at nerd land, thinking about how awesome this will be.”

Billy sighed and closed the lid of his laptop. “Okay. You realize how crazy this sounds, besides why do you need me?”

“We’re the dynamic duo, of course, I need you,” said Tommy, “You write stuff down, you’re organized and you keep me grounded. I need that. It’ll totally help your social skills Plus, we’re identical twins, we gotta have some kind of freaky superpower thing going on. They’ll totally buy that.” Billy rolled his eyes, but he knew his brother was right. First, it had been the years of moving around after Dad died, then mom disappearing and them moving in with their aunt and grandfather. It left different marks on both the boys. “So…you finished your costume for nerdfest?”

“I’m going as Tim Drake, the third Robin, just need to finish sewing the cape and I’m good to go.”

“Nice, you know, one of the detectives at the precinct is also going to this convention.”

“Thousands of people go,” said Billy getting up and putting his laptop into his bookbag, “So where are we going again?”

“A really big house.”

Billy knew he was going to regret this as he pulled up in front of the large mansion. There were already police cars there, as was the forensics van. “You could totally schmooze the forensics guys. You always loved that stuff.”

They looked around the trash, noting the amount of dog food they went through and Tommy finding a cd case to keep. As they moved into the house both boys looked at the pictures. Lots of pictures of the daughter, doing kayaking, piloting, etc.

“This is never going to work,” said Billy looking around.

“Of course, it will.”

“And what if they find out you’re not really a psychic.”

“That we’re not really psychics, and the only way they can prove that, is if one of us tells them.”

Billy shook his head and took out his notebook and pen, Brian MacAllister, missing with dog, he wrote as Tommy ranted about the cute sister and the photographic display of her evolution from quirky teenager to hot and sporty adrenalin girl. He was too infatuated to see her at the stairs, glaring at him.

“I am Katarina MacAllister…and you are?”

“I’m Tommy Lehnsherr, the chief called me. But I promise everything will be alright.”

“I have the same feeling…but how do you know that?” she asked him, Billy rolled his eyes.

“I am a psychic.”

“They brought in a psychic?” Asked Katarina, “Well if you need to ask me any questions…”

“Well both of us are psychics, me and my twin here. But I do have a question, just one! Do you have a boyfriend?”  

“I do…but its nothing serious though.”

“Forgive my brother and his complete lack of tact,” said Billy stepping in, “Billy Lehnsherr…I have a serious question for you.” They talked to her, asking questions about her brother, what he did, who he liked to hang out with.

“Crap!” said Tommy shortly after, as Bishop and Bradley approached.

“Hello Mr. Lehnsher…and Mr. Lehnsherr,” said Bishop.

“I’m the one without the criminal record, and please call me Billy.”

“Call me Kate, and this is my partner Eli Bradley.”

“You may call me Detective Bradley” grunted Eli.

“Kate…well…” began Tommy. But she cut him off.

“You may call me Detective Bishop.” Billy laughed in the background.

So, they solved the case pretty quickly, with Tommy putting on a crazy display of silly antics and getting the real guy arrested. All without Grandpa’s help, unlike Billy had originally proposed. Tommy had gone to see their grandfather anyway. Getting a helping hand. So it shouldn’t have surprised him when he saw Erik at the Chief’s office when he cam to talk to the chief.

“Grandpa!” Tommy and Billy had greeted him.

“Boys!” said Grandpa and turned to Jessica “Thanks for the coffee, Jess, and if you need anything, let me know.” He looked at the boys, giving them a sly wink before Jessica called them into the room.

“Erik finally cleared the air, regarding all of this,” said Jessica. “He explained that these psychic abilities have been an off and on phenomenon since you were little…not a born gift like you made it seen. He also said that your gift works better when you’re together…This is all, of course, weird. But, I can’t argue with your results. So thank you for your assistance and we will call you if we need you.”

The twins left the office with huge grins on their faces. “This may actually work,” admitted Billy, “As long as Detective Eli doesn’t figure you out.”

“You mean figure _us_ out,” said Tommy, draping his arm around his brother. “It’ll be great. Now get out of here and go get ready for your convention.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a slow in update but I have not forgotten about this. It'll be short in its entirety of chapters. But I will update when I can.

PsychAU2

 

            _Before Billy left for the convention, with suitcase in hand, he ended up in front of a random building, with Tommy, who was supposed to take him straight to the airport. They arrived at what looked like the office of a traveling agency, with neat desks in the corners of the room, great shelving, all it was missing was the cheesy posters which read “Imagine yourself on a weekend getaway to the Bahamas” or something of the like._

_“Tommy what are we doing here?”_

_“Our new headquarters! Signed the lease and everything.” He led Billy inside the nice office space._

_“How did you get past the credit check?”_

_“Used your name and forged your signature.”_

_“Tommy!” exclaimed Billy._

_“Grandpa co-signed.”_

_“He did? How did you convince him to do that?”_

_“Easy, I’m his favorite.” Bill wasn’t convinced, “I told him I was setting up a private detective agency with you and since he totally backed up our story with the Chief he was totally on board.” That sounded more like the truth. “I got the furniture, I thought a juice machine could go over there in the kitchen, I have a fridge being delivered tomorrow. Wifi’s being hooked up the day after that and, I even got a name for us.”_

_“What are you calling it?” Tommy grinned, and pushed him back outside, where the new sign had been placed on the large window, “Psych? Really? That was the best you could come up with?”_

_“It works!” protested Tommy. Billy laughed, he supposed it did._

Being at San Diego Comic Con, that weekend was something else. Billy had loved comics ever since his dad had bought him his first comic at the age of five, to get him interested in reading. It wasn’t a superhero comic, although that would come later.  It was just a silly little thing, Tom and Jerry, if he remembered correctly. But it did the trick. It started years of obsession and fanboy antics.

There were crowds of people, tons of merchandise and panels and lines for autographs from celebrities. Billy ended up in the huge line to meet David Yost, the original blue Power Ranger.

            “Omg, did you guys come to the convention together?” asked a girl behind him, dressed as some type of anime character, guessed Billy by the sheer number of accessories. He turned to face her, then to the person in front of him. There stood a broad-shouldered guy, wearing a black wig, and a black t-shirt with a red Superman symbol on it and cargo pants. Poor Billy had been so glued to the trade paperback of Batman and Robin that he totally missed the guy and wow was he handsome.

            “Uh…no, actually,” said the guy dressed like Superboy, “But that’s a one in a 10,000-people kind of coincidence, isn’t it, Timmy?”

            “The name is Red Robin, Superboy,” Billy growled.

            “Of course!” the guy replied with a grin, “He makes a pretty bird, doesn’t he?” he looked at the girl. Damn it! This Superboy had the biggest blue eyes he had ever seen and a familiar look about him, like he’d seen him somewhere before. But if he knew Billy, it didn’t matter. The mask he designed hid his face pretty well and he was determined to stay in character the entire day. Wait…was Superboy flirting with him? _Did that really just happen. Keep it together!_

            The girl giggled and turned to talk to the person behind her.

            “Kon!” said Billy.

            “Tim!” said Superboy.

            “It’s a really nice cape,” flirted Superboy. Billy stared questioningly, waiting for the shoe to drop, “Did you make it yourself?”

            Billy coughed, damn, Superboy had really big blue eyes. “Uh…yeah, my Grandpa taught me how to sew.”

            “Cool Grandpa,” said Superboy with this gleeful smile on his face like he knew the inside joke. Was there a joke? Had Billy missed a joke?

 Turns out Superboy had wanted to do a more complicated costume, but his job kept him pretty busy. He didn’t specify what he did. But based on the build, Billy guesses policemen, firefighter, or government agent. “Have we met before?”

“Don’t think so,” said Billy, but he could have sworn the guy looked familiar. They went through the line together and met David Yost, talking to him about his experiences as briefly as possible and both got in on a picture together.

            “How cool is David Yost?” asked Superboy, “Everything he went through on set and in his personal life and here he is.”

            “Yeah, makes you feel like you can survive anything,” admitted Billy.

            “Want to grab a bite, Timmy?” asked Superboy. Billy nodded and while the food was great, making out with the cute guy dressed as Superboy was the cake on top. He was cute, with strands of blonde hair peeking out from beneath the wig. Billy Kaplan had never done anything like that before in his life. It was exciting to just be in character and have fun without his brain ruining it…

            But reality creeped in way too early as the convention ended and neither boy ever learned the other’s name, as the handsome Superboy cosplayer had to leave.

            Monday afternoon, while Billy was at work, Tommy was enjoying his new favorite dining spot as he stepped out to get a newspaper. Upon his return, he noticed a small blonde girl sitting in his seat, reading a book. He approached her carefully.

            “Excuse me, you’re in my seat,” he said as politely as he could.

            She raised one eyebrow at him and he nodded. “Are you one of those OCD guys who comes in every day and sits in the same seat and orders the same food?” Well that was one way to start a conversation.

            Tommy shook his head, “No no, I was sitting here a minute ago. See, I ordered a juice.” He grabbed the orange juice glass and pulled it over to him, “I just stepped out to get the newspaper.”

            The girl flushed, “Oh…I’m really sorry, I can move.”

            “Nah, don’t worry about it.” He sat down beside her, “So what’s up?

            “Sorry, busy,” said the girl, trying to return to her book, “Don’t have the time.”

            “But you haven’t heard what I’m about to say.” Shee had ignored him focusing on her book, although she didn’t seem too interested in it. He noticed her cell phone had lit up with three missed calls from her mother from various times, her purse had a photo of a little girl and a man who looked just like her. She had cat hair on her flat shoes, and her top was wrinkly, “I did let you have my seat, I think that at least gets me one question.”

            “Look, I’m flattered, really, I am. Normally I am glad to hang out, casually flirt, and never speak again. But today I need to concentrate on my book.”

            “I’ll just have to do the talking for both of us.” Cassie rolled her eyes.

            “Go for it.”

            “Can I at least have a name to work with?”

            “Cassie.”

            “Alright,” said Tommy “Well it’s nice to meet you Cassie, I’m Tommy.” His voice then became higher pitched and mockery, “It’s nice to meet you too Tommy, what do you do?” he changed back to his normal voice, “Oh, a little bit of everything.” As he continued to fake a voice for Cassie she put her book down.

            “Okay, stop! In your portrayal of me, I sound like an eighth-grader.”

            “Don’t like that, huh?” Cassie shook her head, “Well alright, how about this…college, graduated early, top of your class.” His voice went up an octave again as his brain retained the things he noticed from earlier, “I’m new in town and trying to meet new people. I wish I had time to unpack, everything’s a mess. I have a cute cat though, who wouldn’t let me leave the house.” He changed to his voice, “What about your family?” He grinned as he turned on the Cassie voice. “I don’t get along with my mother, but my dad is my best friend…”

            “Okay…do we know each other?” demanded Cassie.

            “Yeah, you’re the girl who stole my seat,” whined Tommy. Cassie’s gaze changed as someone walked through the door. Tommy turned to see a guy in a torn sweatshirt and cap walk in. He turned back to see Cassie reaching for her purse. “Oh, you’re a cop.”

            “No, I’m not,” tried Cassie.

            “The book you were never really reading, the vantage point. Got defensive when the guy walked in. You’re totally a cop.”

            “Tommy,” she said, “Do me a favor and duck.” She pulled her gun out as Altman and a couple of other cops slammed the guy down on the counter and cuffed him. Cassie’s hands shook as she held the gun pointed at the suspect.

            “Hey, Altman!” waved Tommy.

            Teddy gave him a friendly smile before he followed the other detectives out. “First time pulling your gun?” asked Tommy turning back to Cassie who started packing up.

            Cassie ignored him, grabbed her things and left. He picked up the two slices of pie he had ordered and headed back to the detective agency.  Billy had arrived earlier, having finished what he needed to do at the university for the day.

            “How was it?” asked Tommy coming in and hanging his brother a slice of apple pie.

            “It was fun,” said Billy, trying to hide his blush, “And you were right, going for the day was exhausting enough. I can’t imagine being there for all four days.:

            “Who’d you meet?” asked Tommy teasingly, “Was he cute?”

            “Yes, actually, he was. Stop reading me,” Billy dropped his stuff and sat down at the table, “I was dressed as Robin, he was dressed as Superboy…and yeah, we ended up making out. He was really cute.”

            “Did you get his name?” Billy’s blush intensified, “Of course you didn’t, smooth.”

            Billy hung his head, “I panicked.”

            “Hey, hey,” Tommy was next to Billy in an instant, “I was just teasing. It’s okay. It happens. Besides the guy is probably back on the east coast talking about the cute Robin he made out with.” It made Billy smile. “So, let’s see what’s on the tv?” Just as they turned on the TV it was the national spelling bee, where the fan favorite to win had collapsed. They played the clip and both boys were glued.

            “There’s something wrong with that inhaler!” They exclaimed, just as the phone rang.

            “Hello?” asked Billy picking up the phone, “Yes Chief, we’ll be right there.” Tommy smiled, “We got a case, looks like we’re off to the spelling bee!” There was that excitement in his voice, Tommy recognized and groaned slightly.

            They set off downtown, the Chief assigned them to figure out if there was sabotage afoot. So they ended up talking to every child participant and their tiger parents. It was daunting, from the girl who wouldn’t look up from the dictionary, the little boy who looked like he just learned to read yesterday being grilled by his mother, the Czech wunderkind, according to his dad, and so many others.

            After the interviews, they stepped out just as they heard noise about a press conference. They looked up where the Spellmaster was sitting and watched him stumble out and fall from the balcony to his death.

            The police were there pretty quickly, with cute new detective, Cassie Lang, arriving with detective Teddy Altman.

            “So…when do we cancel the event?” asked Cassie, “What’s the procedure?”

            “We can’t cancel,” said Teddy, “This event is really important to these kids.”

            “But won’t this be traumatic for them?” asked Cassie.

            “Good point!” said Teddy, “Let’s set up counseling as an option for the kids and get to work on seeing if this is murder or not.”

            “Sounds good,” Cassie went to call dispatch, while Teddy had to get ready to deal with the press.

            Billy and Tommy managed to sneak into the booth where the victim worked and found a lot of things, including his scribbles. Billy noted the year 1953 circled on the dead man’s legal pad. Tommy noted the funny smell of the food, as and bagged some of it. It smelled like…like something funny. It reminded Billy of something that had gone bad in the Pharmaceutical lab at the university when his boss had him play errand boy and deliver things to the Chemistry department.

            “Hey, is Uncle Pietro still friends with Hank McCoy?”

            “The retired Forensic Scientist? Yeah, they play a monthly poker game.”

            “Think I can get him to run this?” Tommy held up the now bagged Chinese food.

            “Ask Uncle Pietro. I only met the guy when I shadowed him, when we were in high school.”

            They snuck back out just as Teddy was coordinating and trying to get the press out of the room. Billy and Tommy approached and as Teddy turned to wave to them, Billy’s breath caught in his throat. Superboy.

            “Hey Altman!” called Tommy, “We gotta talk.”

            “Excuse me,” said Teddy as he approached Tommy and Billy.

            “Altman, this is my brother Billy.”  

            “Detective, Teddy Altman, pleasure. What did you need guys?”  Billy smiled awkwardly.

            “The victim,” said Tommy, “We’re getting a strong sense that it was murder.”

            “Murder?” asked Teddy, “Are you sure? The guy had serious health problems. Maybe he just had a heart attack.”

            “It’s a really powerful sense.” Added Billy.   

            “Oh, right you’re a psychic too. Chief Jones briefly mentioned it.” Billy could only nod. “I’ll ask the coroner to take a look, but if he says it’s not a homicide, maybe you’ll get another vibe or feeling, or whatever it is.”

            “Thanks, Ted, really appreciate it—how’s your rookie?” asked Tommy.

            “Green,” said Teddy with a laugh, “But so far so good. Reminds me of how I was when I started. She’ll do great.”

            “Great, well, we have to go,” Said Tommy pulling Billy along, “Talk to you soon.”

            “Nice to meet you Billy,” called Teddy. Billy made a sad attempt at a wave.

            With the boys safely back in the car and Tommy driving them to Uncle Pietro’s house, Tommy glanced back at Billy.

            “What was that all about?”

            “So…. turns out Detective Altman is the guy I made out with at Comic-Con.” Tommy’s eye widened and his lips curled into a smile.

            “How is it he didn’t recognize you on sight?”

            “Styled my hair differently and I wore a mask…I was trying to stay in character.”  

            “Huh…” said Tommy.

            “You’re not judging, are you? Because you have no room to judge.”

            “Of course not, baby bro.” Tommy leaned over ruffle his brother’s hair, “I just find it surprising I didn’t pick up on it. Being away from you for so long has totally killed my gaydar.” They both laughed.

            Uncle Pietro was not the easiest person to like. He was tall and menacing and had been the general disciplinarian when Grandpa was working and Mom was…Mom. He greeted them in front of the house with a scowl on his face.

            “Boys!”

            “Hey Uncle Pete. You still friends with Hank McCoy?” asked Tommy.

            “Why?”

            “Need a little favor,” said Billy as Tommy held up the bag of Chinese food. “Can you help us find out if this was poison.”

            Pietro rolled his eyes. “Of course, your little psychic detective agency….” The twins smiled, “Sorry, I’m quite busy.”

“Come on Uncle Pete, I’ll do anything if you promise to call McCoy.” There was a twinkle in their uncle’s eye that made both boys feel uneasy.

“Anything?” Tommy nodded, and Billy’s stomach turned.

“Okay. I’ll help you on one condition. Come on back.” Uncle Pietro led them to the backyard and into the shed where a sad little pile of wood lay into what could have been a birdhouse.

            “You want us to build you a birdhouse?” asked Billy.

            “No!” said Pietro, “I want Tommy to build me a _dog_ house.”

            “What?”

            “When you were in sixth grade you watched Air Bud and asked for a dog. I told you that if you wanted a dog all you had to do was build a house for it.”

            “Was that the week I was with Grandpa in Arkansas?” asked Billy. Pietro nodded. It looked more like a birdhouse, with its tiny door and poorly constructed roof. It wasn’t fair to make a kid make a dog house and Wanda had told her brother as such when she returned home the following week from a conference in Dallas.  Never the less Uncle Pietro’s scheme, whatever it had been worked, since no dog house had been built to his specifications and Tommy abandoned the project and the idea of a dog.

            “Anyway, Tommy is going to finish the dog house, while you and I have a beer and catch up. You been back in Santa Barbara long?” Pietro draped an arm over Billy and headed inside. Billy gave his brother a pleading look that meant, please, ask for my help, don’t make me have a beer with our uncle, by myself.

            Tommy didn’t last long before he said screw it and took off in his motorcycle. Mere hours later, as he lay in the hospital with a boot, his phone started buzzing with frantic messages

            _Where are you?_

_Did you go to Home Depot? It closed two hours ago?_

_Tommy, are you okay?_

_Call me._

Tommy grabbed his phone called his brother.

            “Finally! Where are you? I’ve been worried, did you take off on your bike?”

            “Yeah….um…about that…First, I am perfectly okay…you can just pick me up from Santa Barbara Memorial in the morning.”

            “TOMMY!”

            “It’s just a fracture, I’ll be fine.”

            The next morning Billy showed up to pick up his brother from the hospital after stopping at their favorite place to grab breakfast to go and catch a little bit more of the spelling bee.  

            “How did this happen?” Billy handed his brother his breakfast.

            “Someone ran me off the road.” He bit into his muffin.

            “Someone tried to kill you?”

            “Probably one of those crazed Spelling Bee parents.” Billy nodded.

            “Did you call Grandpa? Or Uncle Pietro?”

            “No!”

            “You should at least let them know you’re okay. I was worried sick.”

            “Uncle Pete only ever cares about results, just like those Spelling Bee parents.”

            Billy sighed, Tommy was a stubborn, hot-headed person, just like Uncle Pietro only neither of them wanted to admit those similarities. Both had soft spots when it came to their younger sibling or siblings and both were incredibly driven…although Tommy was far more at ease than Uncle Pietro ever was.

            “And you’re sure you didn’t just lose control of your motorcycle.”

            “Have I ever lost control?” Billy shook his head, “Exactly, someone tried to run me off the road, or send a very serious message.”  Tommy finished his breakfast and hobbled all over the hospital, looking into every room as they walked down the hallway.

            He found the right room and sure enough there was little Brendan Vu and his mom. Poor kid was fine, just annoyed he was missing the Bee. His inhaler read, _Dr. Temple._

            “Brendan Vu and that Czech kid have the same inhaler.” Tommy noted as they exited the room. “We should look at a seating chart, see who he was sitting next to on day one.”

            “I already did,” Billy pulled out what looked like search engine results. “There’s something weird going on with that kid. I was watching the Bee this morning and the kid’s inhaler read Dr. Zhukov. Only I triple checked google and talked to my contact at the University’s Pharmacy department, the last doctor in the book from their town is Dr. Zeller.”

            “The inhaler is a fake,” the twins exclaimed.  Tommy got a grin and started walking faster. He and Uncle Pietro ended up building the dog house together. Billy watched from the window while casually reading Dr. McCoy’s test results on the victim’s Chinese food.

            When the two men came back in Billy put the folder in his brother’s hands.

            “You were sitting on this the whole time?” asked Tommy.

            “Didn’t Billy tell you McCoy and I play poker? The game was at his house; he’s not very good.”

            “So, I did all of that for nothing?”

            Pietro scowled “No, you did it for the satisfaction of a job well done, given your complete lack of competed tasks over the course of your life.”

            Tommy tried to open his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. He glanced at the file, it was a dangerous poison within the food. Their please to Interim-Chief Jones went unanswered as the toxicology report was still two weeks away. By then it would be too late.

            “Wait, wasn’t Mr. Cavanaugh going to make an announcement?” asked Billy remembering the press releases from that morning.

            “The director said he recently spoke of retiring,” suggested Teddy.

            “But that wasn’t what he was going to say,” said Tommy, sure of himself.

            “And you know this for a fact?” asked Eli who was not even on the case and yet was at the meeting.

            “Mr. Lehnsherr, I asked you boys to check in on the inhaler. If you two have anything about that, I’m all ears.”

            The boys had nothing concrete yet and would have to break into the Spell Master’s room. Tommy snagged the new Spell Master’s jacket, which had the keys to get into the booth, while also locking the real man out of the building.

Tommy stumbled in, still not used to his new boot and noticed indentations in the carpet. “What’s this?”

Billy turned to see what his brother was referring too, “Looks like marks from a tripod.”

“My thoughts exactly baby bro.”

“Alright, what else is there to see here?” Asked Billy, “We should go before it starts.”

_“Is the Spell Master ready? Thirty Seconds!”_ came the voice from the intercom on the desk. Oh no, the Bee was starting.

Tommy hobbled to the closet where a tripod and camera stood. He placed it on the indentations exactly and saw the way the camera angle lined up with…a lamp, that couldn’t be right.

_“10 seconds. Spell Master, we need the first word.”_

“Crap! Oh Crap,” repeated Billy over and over again, his breathing increasing with every crap that escaped his lips.         

“Calm down Billy, I’ve got the camera, you be the Spell Master.”

“Me”

“Has to be you, bro. You know this, You’re good at this.”

_“We need the first word now! What’s going on up there. Something’s wrong send security.”_

Tommy pushed Billy into the chair and handed him the Spell Master’s jacket. “You can do this.”

“Uh, everything’s fine,” said Billy. “The first word is…knaidel.”

The girl looked surprised. “Can you repeat that?”

“Knaidel.”

“Definition please.” Called the girl as Tommy tried to readjust the tripod to find the correct place.

“A type of dumpling eaten by Jewish people typically during Passover.” The girl spelled the word and went to sit down proudly amid applause. The next girl walked up to the microphone.

“I think I got it.” He told Billy and stepped aside so he could take a look through the camera.  “He was watching the Czech.” Billy looked through the camera and sure enough there sat the father of the Czech boy.

_“We need the next word!”_ Called the person through the intercom. Billy jumped back into position.

“Abkhazia!” said Billy.

“Definition please.” Called the girl.

“A disputed territory located on the eastern coast of the Black Sea, and south of the Greater Caucasus Mountains, within nation of Georgia.”

As soon as they took a break, Billy and Tommy snuck out of the room.

“You make an excellent Spell Master. If the whole PhD and history thing doesn’t work out you could have a great career.”

“Thanks,” Billy told him, “Should we call the Chief?”

“This doesn’t prove anything though.” Said Tommy. “All we know is he was taking pictures of the dad.”

“There was a purpose to everything Cavanaugh did.” On the way back to the auditorium they found the list of all the different winning words and rounds. It was now down to two spellers. Billy sat down beside his brother and started looking through the list. Tommy continued to stare at the father of the Czech kid.

“Poor Brendan Vu went down on gladiolus, that was the winning word in 1929, the first Bee….” Billy looked over the list, “All the words from that round were winning words. It must have been a theme round. This one from the 1967 Bee, and this one from the 1933 Bee.”

“And the kid who got the winning word from 1953 was the kid whose father we’ve been staring at.”  

“Cavanaugh was going to disqualify him!” exclaimed Tommy in a whisper. Then the final word for the kid was given, and he watched as the dad sent a signal through something in his arm, to the kid’s fake inhaler. “I figured it out!”

“I’ll call the Chief.” Said Billy. A little bit later the official winner was announced, the Czech kid, and his father were on stage, as his name was announced.

Billy let Tommy have his moment, let him prove himself to the other detectives as Teddy, Cassie, Eli, and Chief Jones watched as he ran up the stage.

“Bravo!” Cheered Tommy as he grabbed the hands of the father and son and raised them high in the air. “This competition meant everything to Miklous, didn’t it?” Tommy then began vibrating like an otherworldly force had taken hold. “Billy! Brother! It’s happening, please send me your energy.” He stumbled, then recovered as Billy gave an offhanded wave, that looked more like a courtesy than anything supernatural. “I know who killed Elvin Cavanaugh.”

“Why can’t he just tell us who to arrest?” asked Jessica with a small whine.

“He does this a lot?” asked Cassie. Everyone, including Billy, said “yes.”

“I’m sorry, I’m a slave to my visions.” Said Tommy and Billy rolled his eyes as everyone else stared in fascination. He would have to tell Tommy to tone down the theatrics later.

“I could cuff him.” Suggests Eli and everyone turns to glare at him.

“Why would I want that?” asked Jessica.

“Just a suggestion.”

“I cannot control the full force of my visions like my brother. He is a beacon and I am the vessel.” Tommy then explained how Miklous and his son Jiri had been cheating, and how. Cavanaugh, having been obsessed with cheating was going to disqualify Jiri and expose the two of them. Miklous then poisoned Cavanaugh to hide the cheating so his son could win the bee. “I bet at your house we’ll also find the van that ran me off the road.”

“It’s true.” Cut in Cassie. “They were so sure, so I had the lab run the food we found at the crime scene. Nothing is definite though, but I suspect the lab results will confirm what Billy and Tommy have…divined.”

“We’ll take it from here.” Said Jessica and they went to cuff Miklous.

“All’s well that ends well,” supposed Billy as Cassie and Eli put the father and his son in the police cruiser.

“Except you still haven’t talked to Detective Altman.”

“And you keep getting on Head Detective Ellie’s nerves.”

“You mean Eli?” asked Tommy, “He’s got a stick up his butt. Thus, making him a perfect target for our ridicule. But don’t try to change the subject. You have to talk to Teddy and you gotta play up the psychic thing. If I’m the only one doing the theatrics, then they’ll get suspicious.”

“Speaking off, where did that Detective Bishop you told me about go?”

“Temporary reassignment to the Mayor’s office. She’ll be back next month.” Said Tommy grinning. “And you changed the subject again.”

They walked off together, while Detective Teddy Altman and Junior Detective Cassandra Lang got into their vehicle ready to head back to the station.

“So wait, you’re a giant nerd?” asked Cassie, “And you went to comic con and made out with a guy dressed as Robin?” Teddy tried not to blush, “That’s awesome. Did you ever catch his name?”

“Nope. But there was something familiar about him that I can’t quite place.”

“That’s a mystery for us then,” grinned Cassie, “I’ll start perusing the tumblr cosplay photo pages from the convention and you can write down all the ticks you noticed about the guy. Between 1.5 amazing detectives in this vehicle we’ll find him.”

“Two detectives.” Corrected Teddy.

“Nope, this is my first week on the job, I only count as half until I can manage to solve a case by myself.”

“Don’t sell yourself short Cassie, you’re doing great.”

Cassie smiled as she buckled her seat belt, “Let us go forth and find your prince charming.”

“He was dressed like Robin.”

“Details.” Said Cassie waving him off.

Across town, in the beachy suburb of a house, three people sat on the porch, nursing a beer.

“Bill called,” said Pietro, “They solved the case.”

“I cannot believe you actually let them run with this ruse, father. It seems just a tad out of character for you.” Said Lorna looking at her father.

Erik Lehnsherr simply grinned as he took a sip of his beer. Having helped to raise his grandsons, he knew them better than anyone, and he would fight anyone who said otherwise. His plan was going smashingly and would, perhaps one day lead to something rather intriguing.

“This may be the very thing to help Tommy find his place in the world,” said Erik, while Pietro snorted.

 

**Author's Note:**

> So I rushed the crime solving part, that won't be a continuous thing, I promise. But there's a reason why I did it. I wrote this chapter mostly from memory of the first psych episode and I needed it to establish the characters. The other stuff is going to be a bit more out there and semi-intertwined with the Psych canon with my own twist.


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